Here is a recent shot of Leroy.  He hasn't quit in about two weeks and even gave himself a 'uniform'.

This is Stephanie.  Like many Zoners, she is a jobless single parent with a social worker assigned to her.  Stephanie told me that her social worker instructed her to ask me for a 5 Day Notice to Evict (once a year UMOS will pay a person's rent with a valid 5 DN).

Translation = Zoner lies and tells a quasi government organization that she can't pay this month's rent.  Quasi government organization gives her a month's rent (your tax dollars) and zoner gets to pocket tax funded monthly assistance that she already has.

Dude, I know where your car is.

I know what you're thinking and you're right - I do share many traits with Mother Theresa.  Truth be told, I am a "giver".  That's why when I saw baby daddy (car pictured below) parking in my lot, I GAVE him some great advice. I told him that this lot was now being patrolled by a towing service and that if he didn't move his car, the chances were very good that it would be removed.  The next day, he parked in the same place, the bottom pic is the wrecker that snagged it.

Mi amigo Jose lives in the house next door and called me during the fracas warning me that baby daddy pulled a hand gun out of the trunk before the wrecker took it.  This tale may have one more chapter. 

This one happened over the summer.  I was cutting grass with Mike and in my haste, I forgot to secure one of the lawnmowers.  I think it rolled out of my trailer on 16th and Greenfield.  If anyone finds it, I won't need it until 2016 because Mike is back in the HOC.

I don't want to know anymore about this.

Do you know why so many stoves in the Zone have the cosmetic portion of the door removed?

Here's what happens-Say a Zoner wants to make a pizza, turning on the oven to 400 is too complicated and will take too long.  Instead, the oven is turned to CLEAN.  20 minutes later the pizza is turning black, smoke is pouring out of the oven and cannot be opened.  Thus, the cover panel is ripped off in an attempt to open the door.